Things I’m going to have when I’m rich

Things I’m going to have when I’m rich

1.) Someone to shell peanuts for my consumption.

2.) Someone to clean the bathroom after every use.

3.) REALLY fast Internet. Not just “Wow, that’s fast!” but “Huh… you must have already had that page up.”

4.) Rides on vintage airplanes

5.) A factory to build good quality, Logo-less, black hooded, zippered front sweat shirts.

6.) String of restaurants around town that all have reserved tables for myself.

7.) Full scale replica of the U.S.S. Oregon which I will donate to the City of Portland (again) with the cavet that it may not be donated for the war effort.

8.) Old limo like the one from Addams Family.

9.) Pearl Handled six shooter that will be stolen by my Nemesis which I will then need to heroically get back after we battle to the death.

10.) Physical Nemesis, not merely an ideology, but someone real.

11.) A building at the Zoo, filled with live exhibits. The “Richard Hamell Sasquatch Natural Habitatorium and Interpretive Center” has a nice ring to it.

12.) Good quality fedora and hiking boots

13.) A giant Douglas Fir growing through the middle of my house.

14.) Nice view from the bedroom of my house. Waking up to the Pacific Ocean, or Downtown Seattle would be cool

15.) Luxury Dirigible for traveling around the world.

16.) Autographed picture of Jamie Farr